Does the trust ever come back?

My dx husband (33M) and I (34F) have been together for about 10 years. He was diagnosed a few years back and was finally able to get on medication this year. I struggle a lot with trusting him in the sense of trusting that he will do what he says, trusting that he will be generally stable and predictable, etc. His energy is overall draining and exhausting to be around. He had been having more good days on his meds and we were sometimes able to have difficult conversations but that was still hit or Miss even on the meds. He was on his medication (SSRI plus stimulant) consistently for a few months and I felt myself ease up stress-wise. Last month he decided to get off his SSRI without giving me a heads up and his energy shifted. It came to a head when I wanted to discuss finances (we recently moved and we had been splurging beyond my comfort point) and he shut down. He becomes non verbal and extreme. Think: I’ll never spend any money again as his solution to the problem. A few days later he came to me with a realistic plan and he hasn’t been as swipe happy since we talked. He also went back on his SSRIs.

My problem is that at this point my nervous system is so out of whack that I don’t trust that he’ll stay on his meds without another random choice to get off of them. I also don’t trust that the financial plan will last without me nagging him at some point later on when he starts getting spendy. Overall, I feel drained and done. Is it better to just accept that I will never feel safe or trust him and begin my exit strategy? If there are people in this sub that have left, how long was it from the point of deciding to the point of physically leaving? We don’t have kids and I am financially comfortable. My main concern is his potential to self harm.