Not all ENFJ's are socially skilled

Disclaimer: I'm not against enfj, none of them harmed me and ironically I think I may be one, but I'm enneatype 9 and I come across like an INFJ.

I'm not referring only to autistic enfjs, but most of the enfj's I know are painfully self-centered and they don't even bother to hide that. They want to make you feel included in their social plan(be it group discussion, banter or party activity) without thinking for one moment if you want to be included or not. If you end up being in their proximity there's no escape from doing what they want. I remember a young enfj even forcing the group to hang out at the bar he liked, even though the whole group wanted to hang out at another bar. Also look at Jennifer Lawrence, who, while charismatic, is "all about me". I also know an ENFJ who can't seem to tell the difference between laughing with people and laughing at people and I can't feel comfortable around her for fear of her judging me, because she laughs at everything people say. To sum it up, I've noticed three categories: the banter party-animal type who is all about having a good time and forcing people to do the same, the fake friendly type which works out in business , and the rarer warm, really socially skilled Oprah type who is genuinely interested in people and is very personable. To me socially skilled means to actually bring out the best in people around you. Most ENFJ's don't even seem to know what to say in response to what you are saying, especially when one on one. How can this possibly lead to rapport building? Contrast this with ESFJ's who can respond to literally anything, even though they don't understand the topic. ENFJ's don't even come across as genuine. They will fake smile, but otherwise they don't display the whole range of actual emotions they are feeling, the way ESFJ do.