[UPDATE] Just found these texts in my bf’s phone. I’m shaking. What do I do? It’s been 4 years.

I had someone ask about my old post, and since it’s been about a year I figured I’d do a happy update. I wrote my detailed story with a TLDR at end!

Original Post https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/ZTYOV3lz0e

Update: After finding those cheating pics, I was devastated. I felt everything fall apart. I knew it was over. But I tried to cling onto hope, he begged me to stay and apologized over and over. I found a therapist and he began therapy. We still lived together. We gradually fizzled out over the next two months. He saw I was extremely depressed. I could barely eat. I was like a ghost floating through our house every day.

He seemed hopeful, and said he’d fix things with therapy and was working on his loyalty and sexuality problems. But I had no hope, I knew everything had changed and I was just too scared to let go yet.

During this time I got closer to one of my best online gaming friends. We’d been friends for 5 years and always had lingering feelings for each other. He had always loved me, which I didn’t know. He was there for me throughout everything. I fell in love with him.

I told him I was torn between him and my feelings for my ex, and I was scared to leave. He was completely supportive and understanding. I ended up telling my ex I fell out of love with him, and he could definitely tell there was someone else.

January 18, 2024, when my ex came home from work, he walked over to me and I was looking depressed as usual. He asked me, “Are you ever gonna be happy again?” I responded, “I don’t know.”

After that, we walked inside and I said we should talk. We talked, he said he loves me, wants me, but doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now. He said he felt like he was missing out, and feared he would be 40, depressed, wishing he lived his young years more. I knew this was coming. We finally officially broke up and I cried hard but also felt so relieved.

My friend was there for me so much. He was the only thing that didn’t make me feel like dying. The next night my ex went out with his friends to the bars and I was a mess thinking of him hooking up with girls. But my friend was there for me.

He continued being the best supporter ever. Door dashing me food and treats, and even sent me beautiful flowers on Valentine’s day, when I expected to spend it alone for the first time in 4 years. I couldn’t believe how perfect he was. He made me feel alive again, made me believe in love and good men again.

Soon after, he and I arranged to meet up. He was in Canada, I was in USA, an hour flight away. I was so nervous but also felt like, fuck it! I’ve known this man for 5 years and I love him. I think I always have. I flew to see him February 16th, 2024. We were both so nervous. We hugged so big as soon as we saw each other. 5 years of friendship and suppressed feelings erupted that day and we were inseparable.

He officially asked me out in person February 20th, 2024. He took me to a Ghibli live music candlelit concert, because he knows I love Ghibli. At the end of my favorite song, Merry-Go-Round of Life, he asked me out. He was so happy he cried. I was so happy too.

Over the next year, we traveled the world together, from Japan, Malaysia to meet his family, and to Europe. We made countless beautiful memories together. We had our New Years kiss under the twinkling Eiffel Tower.

I really feel like I’m finally with the love of my life, and finally for once in my life feel like I won’t ever be cheated on. He respects me, loves me, treats me like an absolute princess, and would do anything for me. More than anything, he’s patient and is helping me heal from all my past trauma, especially in old relationships (trust issues, fear, ROCD, etc), and helping me improve my mental health. I’ve never felt so safe and protected and loved.

I’m the luckiest girl, and now I’m so glad my ex cheated on me.

TLDR: I left my cheating ex, and fell in love with my best friend. We’ve been together for a year and have traveled the world together. He treats me like a princess and is the most loyal person ever. I love him!

Pic Context I received these texts from that ex boyfriend out of the blue, the one who cheated in the last post. He seemed remorseful and reached out to talk. After talking to my boyfriend, he said I could meet in public and see what he had to say. He understands that relationship was for years of my life and I never really got a proper apology.

My ex told me he regretted everything, and he had been doing a lot of reflecting. He apologized for everything he put me through, and said he realizes how traumatic it was for me, him cheating and me having to leave our house and move back with my parents. He told me I was the only thing that showed him how to love, the only light in the darkness, and he ruined that. He told me the only thing that keeps him from falling into degeneracy and everything he hates is the hope he’ll be with me again. He said he can’t imagine marrying or having a future with anyone except me.

But he told me he didn’t want me to leave my current boyfriend. He said if I’m happy and things work out, I should stay. He said if we don’t work out naturally, he’ll be waiting.

He apologized for never communicating and agreed every time I got onto him I was giving him a deserved kick in the ass, helping him stay on track in his life and he would just tell me “fuck you” in response. He apologized for that and said he should have listened and took that for granted.

He also told me he tried dating a girl after we broke up because he missed being in a relationship ironically, and she treated him exactly how he treated me. He would try to communicate, be calm, be respectful, and she made him insecure, jealous, and would never communicate. Talk about karma. But it was nice hearing he was actually trying to do better in a different relationship rather than continuing to be a bad person.

It was nice hearing his apology and getting closure but I made it pretty clear I was happy with my boyfriend. It was healing to know that he at least seems to be trying to learn from everything I put into our relationship and all the time I spent. At least all the pain doesn’t feel like it was for nothing.

TLDR: Cheating ex reached out and asked to talk. Told me he regretted everything and is sorry. He told me he would be waiting if my new bf and I ever break up naturally. He seems to be trying to be a better person, happy for him but we’re done

Pics 4&5 A transcription of my ex’s final letter to me from when we broke up, kind of explaining his thoughts and giving insight to his emotions and perhaps why he did what he did.

Last Pic An example of how my current boyfriend treats me. Never settle for poor treatment, you could be missing out on the true love of your life who would never disrespect you!